Had a rather happening day today. Things juz happened and it triggers alot of thinking today.. muz say today really kill alot of braincell and had been a tiring day for my mind.. went to sim lim in the noon wif sis, alan and anson. Initially, it was a happy trip but somehow, things didnt turn out really well and alan ji tao sian 1/2 which i can totally understand in a guy's point of view.. After dat i wnt to had dinner wif my ex gf. While driving there suddenly i had the feeling of happiness and had this tot.. It was a joy for me to go and fetch her but somewhere during our relationship i seems to have lost this feeling of 幸福 and i begin to wonder why is this the case.
The only logical ans i can give myself is dat the very same act of happiness had become a kind of
无形的压力 as time goes by. 也许一件事情做久了之后是会累的 or maybe because the car doesn't belong to me or should i say everything that i possess now (material wise) does not belong to me, dat's why i felt that it's not MYSELF giving her happiness thus makin me feel unhappy. Anyway, i've come to realise dat what i really want now is to be financially independent though its highly impossible for the next 2 years.. :( but at least i shall make it a point dat i wont have to 依赖 on him for what i want to do.. I know dat at times i can be rather nua and take the easy way out. But this time, time shall be the judge... hope i will really be able to persevere. 加油。。。。。
Blogged @ 12:43 AM
Don't let me go -